1774

Sweetheart, what nonsense you spoke yesterday. Your words still have me laughing even today. What happy hours I spend with you. We spend some four hours together, and I’m not bored in the slightest and must always force myself, reluctantly, to part. My precious dear, I love you extraordinarily; you’re nice, and clever, and merry and amusing, and I don’t need the rest of the world when I’m sitting with you. Never in my life have I been as happy as when I’m with you. I often wish to hide from you my inner feelings, but my heart usually blurts out its passion. It must be that it’s full to the brim and so spills over. I didn’t write to you the other day since I got up late and you would have been attending to your day’s affairs.

Farewell, brother, behave cleverly around others so that no one can say straight away what is or is not on our minds. I find a little dissembling terribly amusing.

Hello, my love. I awoke so cheerful it’s frightening. Oh, my love, don’t be angry, for you love it when I am cheerful…

My darling, my dear, my beloved, I have lost all common sense today. Love, love is the reason. I love you with my heart, mind, soul and body. I love you with all my senses and shall love you eternally. Precious darling, I kindly beg you--do me the favor and love me too. For you are a good and generous person. Do your best to make Grigory Aleksandrovich love me. I tenderly beg you. Also, write me how he is--is he merry and well?

I thought my dog had gone mad today. She came in with Tatiana, jumped up in bed with me, sniffed a bit, and shuffled on the bed, and then began to move about and to snuggle up to me as if she were happy to see someone. She loves you very much, and so is even dearer to me. Everyone on earth, even the dog, confirms your place in my heart and mind. Consider how dear Grishenka is. He doesn’t leave my mind for an instant. Truly, my love, it’s frightful, frightful how dear you are.